Honesty, Car Tires, and Ice Picks

Is it possible to be too honest, or is honesty always the best policy?

I hover between two worlds with this answer. In some cases, you should be too honest with dopey friends who refuse to see the errors of their ways. Your words should be the metaphorical brick that hits them in the back of the head and shakes them into their right state of mind. 

Sometimes. 

In some cases, you should be the friend who sits and listens only giving a “There, there” or “Things will get better” mumbling response, tag teamed with appropriate coos and sighs. (In my circle, I am normally the one who wraps up the conversation with “So, when do we slash his or her tires?” That’s how I do empathy: revenge humor.)

The drawback of both approaches is that neither one helps the person with the issue. Sometimes, they don’t want my advice or help. They just need to let their feelings and tears flow. I have a one-tissue minimum, so there isn’t much crying around me. 

A person has to come to their own truth and be honest with themselves. It is never possible to be too honest with yourself when you are facing your own created and socially accepted boogie men and monsters. Honesty is always the best policy when you are hashing through the muck of life to find what you want to do to make your life worth living. 

But as a friend, it’s best to just put the tissue box on the table in case they need to cry and gather the available ice picks (for the stabbing of the miscreant’s tires). Be there, listen, and wait for that person to come to their own truth. 

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